Archive-name: Bestial/dhmp2.txt Archive-author: Tall Thin Jones Archive-title: Lady From the beginning. I have been asked when I first knew I was a zoophile. Actually, I don't know of a time I wasn't in some way or another. I always did get pleasure from touching animals, and I would go against or go around anyone or anything who tried to stop me. No, it's not like I would climb fences to pet lions or anything silly. My mother didn't like me playing with the neighborhood cats and I would do it any time I could get away with it and a few times I couldn't. In fact, my mother usually used that term, "playing" with considerable scorn, as if "playing" were some nasty thing that babies did because they were nasty. At best, playing was useless and much less important than serious things like dishes and kissing up. I do know the cats were unwanted competitions for my mother's love. How could she properly punish me by withholding her love when I could find refuge with the cats who would love me uncritically? How could she use imaginary hurts against me if I had companions who lived so much closer to reality? How could she deceive me if I knew honesty? Sure, this sounds cynical. Yet, truth be told that this is less than the half of it. I did learn first-hand what was wrong with the excuse that other families were worse. I remember seeking love from girls my age with great desparation (I was desparate, not the girls (the girls were simply pathetic)). Even after learning the hard way that these girls would take advantage of my desparation, I had to find the explanation in writing before I could really understand what had happened. This is a common thread that runs through politics, sexual politics, gambling halls, schoolrooms, and sales tactics. If someone wants something someone can sell it to them. If someone is desparate, the price can be very high. I remeber great fear of my developing sexuality. Even before I ever had sex with animals, I knew that I was terribly afraid to kiss girls. Then we did do a lot of touching and holding, but when I was offered a kiss I was desparately afraid. I also feared touching breasts, buttocks, and whatever it was down there under the zipper. An arm around the waist was wonderful. I loved to hold hands. Eyes were quite compelling. Thank you, C., for the times you gave me. Sometimes you let me hold your hand at a basketball game. You tolerated my desperation and let me touch and hold you after a lot of the others no longer would. I wish we could have had some honest talks with each other. Who was your boyfriend then? I know you had at least one boyfriend who didn't mind the innocent touching we did. I don't think I ever knew his name. Maybe you and he are why I don't think of the human race as total cruds. I was about 11 or 12 when I first saw a pair of dogs coupling. The bitch's vagina was quite swollen and the dog's penis looked strange and rather large. I did wonder what it would be like to put my own penis in there. It seems I had the idea of doing it with animals since my mother told me and my sister about the birds and the bees. I was really scared of getting some girl pregnant. My mother told me that if I did get a girl pregnant she would shoot me. She tried to tell me later that she was joking. This was much later and I didn't believe her. My first sexual contact with an animal was with a male part Labrador puppy my step-father gave me. I was quite sexually ignorant. Somehow it just seemed natural that I could fuck the puppy as a substitute for a girl. I had only a very hazy concept of the relative sizes of the penis and the vagina, and I didn't even know if I had a male or a female. So, I took the puppy into the garage when no one else was home and I tried to do it to him. I put my penis under his tail at approximately the place where the vagina was located in anatomical drawings of women. No, it didn't go in, though it felt wonderful to rub against all that fur. I didn't even find the anus until later. When I kept trying this my penis slipped underneath the puppy and I thought I had entered him, but found out that I had just slipped down between his legs. I was SO sensitive then. Just rubbing into the fur between his legs felt incredibly good. Then, the puppy turned around and licked the head of my penis, once. I can't describe just how wonderful that was. I can say it was like electricity from head to toe. I got hooked on this experience, and the puppy was quite happy to oblige me. It wasn't long after that until I had him licking my own hole. I got to liking that better because the puppy was getting into the habit of biting a bit when he licked my penis, but he never bit my bottom. I guess he didn't think there was anything to chew on back there. He really seemed to like this a lot. I don't remember exactly when I started being able to have orgasms by hand. Midnight (the puppy) would gladly help me do this. He was getting big by then. Every day when I came home from school I would go into the garage where he was kept, drop my drawers, and let him work on the back while I worked on the front. I would squirt a lot of white sperm all over that wall of the garage. Later, I would try to fuck him under the tail. He would let me keep trying, and I never succeeded. Just about the time I started to get in he would pull away. I remember a jar of vaseline my stepfather kept in the headboard of a bed out there. (I don't know exactly what he used it for. It had numerous finger-tracks in it). What I don't remember is why I never greased Midnight up when I tried him. I suspect, but never will know, that my stepfather did. I also tried on many occasions, unsuccessfully, to get Midnight to fuck me from behind. He would try very hard to do this, but we never got into the right position. He would always end up hitting me somewhere too high. I guess he got too excited and maybe I just curled up too much because I was both scared and excited. He would squirt a bit on me. I don't think I ever did bring him off by hand, either. I really did miss him when my step-father gave him away, without warning and without giving a reason. There were a lot of loose dogs in that neighborhood then. If it wasn't close to an election, all I had to do was step outside and whistle and a canine lover would appear, usually male. They always seemed to have willing tongues, and a fair number of them would allow me to handle them and masturbate them to orgasm. It was wonderful to watch them squirting their clear cum all over the ground, or over my hands, or over my chest and belly when I had the chance. I liked to catch it in my hands and lubricate myself for a really exciting jerk-off. For some reason dog semen seemed a lot more slippery than it does now. Bear and Blue were a wonderful pair of dogs owned by a neighbor. Every once on a while they were both loose and would come to visit me. We would play, and I would stroke both of them until they squirted their semen, and use it to help me get off myself. Actually, Bear visited a lot more by himself. He was one of the main characters of my sexual life as a teenager. Bear was half German Shepherd and half Saint Bernard. He was a tawny yellow-tan color, with fairly short hair that did shed. He weighed well over a hundred pounds. He was so gentle and friendly that almost no one ever complained when he was out loose. I suspect he had a route of people he visited for sex. Blue was about half the size of Bear, and I think he was a blue-merle collie. I don't remember a lot about him. He would get jealous if I would go to visit Bear when they were both tied up, so I usually wound up satisfying him first then getting together with Bear. With Blue I would sometimes get him to mount me after I had stroked his cock and it was hard. Later I found out why he never humped me when I did this, and why other dogs also didn't. I didn't know then that when the dog's penis is fully erect he is usually through humping. My memories of what I did with Blue are unclear. I think I sometimes did put some Vaseline under his tail and go in. I know I didn't do this with him very often. My experiences with Bear stand out pretty sharply. He and I got together often and we made it hot and heavy. Bear really loved to lick me from the front or from behind. I would let him lick and lick and he would just keep right on doing it. The saliva under his tongue was slippery, so I would jerk myself off while he was licking me, allowing the saliva to lubricate my hand. He also loved licking up my sperm when I came, so I got the wonderful sensation of cumming right into his licking mouth. He would also let me stroke my penis inside his jowls a bit, and this felt really nice. He loved to be masturbated, and his endurance seemed endless. When standing I could jerk his cock and he would push it back and forth in my hand. His sperm would make a big puddle on the garage floor. He never did get completely swollen, he just seemed to be able to hump and squirt forever. I would eventually get impatient and do something else. I did often try to get him to enter me from behind. Bear was very willing to try this, but we never could quite make the connection. The time he almost hit the hole, he hit me in that sensitive spot just above it hard and it hurt. I pulled away and ran back to the house, and he kept trying to mount me while I was trying to get away from him. Poor dog! I just had him over-excited and he knew I had wanted it as badly as he did. Bear was quite anally erotic. This was lucky for me, and it was good that he was so large. When I got the idea to try to enter him anally I had little idea how to go about it, and I was a bit abrupt. I rubbed some vaseline under his tail, and I pushed, and it went right in! The first time, he pulled away. I tried it again, and the second time he just relaxed and accepted me. At first I couldn't work myself all the way to orgasm that way. The first few times was because he wouldn't hold still. When he got used to being butt-humped and found he liked it, he would let me do it for a minute or two and then he just had to mount me. That dog got really turned on whenever I would go under his tail. I would have to satisfy both of us by hand. Sometimes I would let him mount me, and I would stroke him buy hand and let him squirt his hot semen all over my back. Other times he would go at me from the front and I would stroke myself while I stroked him. Eventually I learned that I could reach around him while I was humping him, and stroke his cock while I fucked him. This felt really good for both of us. He would get off, and I had a warm cock to play with while I was inside a wonderfully juicy hole. This dog could juice up just like a female. I would come with an intensity that made my knees weak. God, people played headgames in that little town. One of my "friends" made a habit of cruelly teasing me about how close I was to Bear. "Is his dick out?" "Yeah, his dick's out! He's trying to fuck you!" I don't know why I put up with the little pea-brain. Maybe it was because I enjoyed running across the yard with him, and when his attention was distracted I would run under the lowest part of the clothesline. His throat was about the same height the top of my head was, and he did some really good flops when he hit that clothesline running. He had no warning because I normally slouched a bit when I ran, and I didn't have to duck. Lady was a medium sized female hunting dog. I don't know what breed she was. She was white with feathery hair that was short but not too short, and had bluish-black spots of color in her fur. She was very soft to the touch. I saw her after some new neighbors had moved in across the street. At that time I had been masturbating male dogs for some time, and I decided I would go out and see if this dog liked it. I was actually a little surprised to find out that she was a female. When I approached her she was very friendly and very touchable. I stroked her and rubbed her belly and she gave my face a lick and we were friends. That night I walked over there under cover of darkness. I was pretty nervous, and when I heard the thunder of heat lightning I had this brief terror that God was going to get me for sinning like this. Lady had a small barn-like garage to herself, and there was a toolshed next to it with a gap between them about two and a half feet wide. It was good concealment. I got her to come to me. I rubbed her back and her legs. Her fur was quite soft. She smelled warm and clean, but just unscrubbed enough that she smelled like a dog. Her smell was compelling. I loved to just hold her and smell her. She seemed to like it right away when I felt her bottom. When I touched her hot cunt lips she clamped her tail down and held it to the side. She seemed to really like it when I slipped a finger in and started working it back and forth. I bent down and put my tongue in her. The taste seemed repulsive the first time, I made a face and quit doing it. The aftertaste was quite pleasant, though. It was just so strong. Later I could get hard just sticking my tongue in her, or smelling my fingers after they had been inside her. That time I found out I couldn't even get the head of my penis inside this dog. She was quite cooperative, but just too tiny. That is, her entrance was too tiny. I didn't really know it then, but like all female dogs in the fifty pound range, she had enough room on the other side of that entrance for two of me. I couldn't get it in, but it felt very good stroking against the hot slick spot between her vaginal lips. I held the head of my "tool" against her and rubbed it up and down until I was ready to come. When I came, I tried to hold it against her while I squirted inside her. Most of it didn't go in, but I was quite satisfied. I blacked out momentarily from the pleasure, not quite falling down but it was like the universe became a single white point of pleasure. This was something that I had waited 13 years for, and it was absolutely wonderful. I felt good for hours afterward, and always would. We became good friends, and I would often visit her at night, always being very careful not to be spotted. She was always ready. She would see me coming and bark a short bark. I learned to whisper her name from a distance, and she would then be silent because she knew it was me. When I got there she would first jump on me, and lick my face once or twice. Then she would have to go back out and run back and forth on her chain to wind down. She would pass me moving like a grey furry bullet. If I was quick I could stroke her on the back on the way by. When she got wound down enough, she would come back to me and stand very still, shaking a little. She would be a little tense, and I could hear her whine just a little. I could tell that she had a very strong desire. Her breathing was very compressed by her emotion. It was my job to release her tension. Usually, after I was finished, she was not. After I had spent myself and turned her loose, very often Lady would run from me, and hit the end of her chain barking her fool head off. I never understood for certain why she did this until one warm summer night. By this time, I had penetrated Lady successfully. A couple of weeks after she had her pups, I tried her and it went in. She whined a bit, I am afraid it did hurt at first, but she didn't try to get away from me. After she had relaxed a bit she seemed to enjoy the attention. She never refused me, ever. She got to wanting to see me often. I could stand in my parent's driveway and whisper her name, then go to the back porch and wait in the darkness. Five or ten minutes later, there she would be. She would slip her chain and come to see me. On this night, I had an area in the garage with an old couch and an old console color television set. I sometimes stayed out there most of the night. Lady happened to be loose. I don't think I had asked her to come over that night, but she was quite welcome. She came into the garage, jumped on the couch with me, and we hugged for a while. Then I got down and licked her cunt while she was standing on the couch. When I had her wet with my saliva and her own juices I put her down on the floor and pushed my cock, which was so hard it was almost hurting, up into her. She was used to this by now and accepted it with pleasure. She gave that slight whine that was almost singing. I had a thought, and I turned on the TV to a blank channel so I could watch this coupling in the light. We did this for a while, then I turned off the TV so it would be dark again. Since I had her to myself in a fairly safe place for the night, I wanted to take my time to orgasm, and try some positions. I laid back on the couch and pulled Lady on top of me. She squirmed a bit, trying to get comfortable in her new position. It was hard to get into her from that angle, but I managed. Lady wasn't completely comfortable with laying on top of me like this, or being held, but I went ahead and tried to get her to like it. She seemed quite willing to have sex if she could just reach a position she felt comfortable with. I held her against my stomach. Her warm fur and flesh felt very good against my bare skin. I couldn't work myself fast enough to actually make it, but it felt very very good. Lady seemed to get a bit more tense as I did this, then suddenly she started really breathing hard, then she hugged her sweet warm body against me as tightly as she could, and pressed her face against mine. She held me like that for a minute or so, then released me. I let go of her, and she slowly disengaged. Then we got ourselves into the usual doggy-style position, and it didn't take a long time for me to shoot inside her. As usual with her, I came so hard I saw stars and felt like I would black out. This time, when Lady left she didn't bark, and she didn't have to run. She just slowly walked away, looking much more relaxed than I had seen her for a while. Then I realized that she had had her orgasm. I don't think this is common for female dogs, but she had cum all at once instead of the many many times that a lot of females do, and she had done it with a bang! After that time, I don't know if she had learned to become orgasmic, or if I had become a better lover. The tension I could feel in her muscles when we started had pretty much dissolved by the time I had left, and she didn't take off barking after I had made it, or at least not often. I think once I knew that she could gain such satisfaction from sex I would take more time pleasing her so she could have her own orgasm. I have a lot more stories. A lot of the females I had would have rather quiet orgasms that I could only detect as pulsations against my cock, finger, or tongue. I learned how to train females to hump when their clitoris was rubbed, which they will do if it is done right. A trained female dog might even mount and hump me while I rub her clit, and she will hump as wildly and moan just as loudly as any male would. Some would back against me and hump wildly when I penetrated them. Helping female dogs get off is a very pleasant and satisfying part of human-animal sex. --