### ### ### ### ### #### ### ### ### #### ### ### ##### ### ### ### ### ### ### ### ### ### ##### ### ### ########## ### ### ########## ### ### ### ### Underground eXperts United Presents... ####### ## ## ####### # # ####### ####### ####### ## ## ## ## ##### ## ## ## ## ## #### ## ## #### # # ####### ## ## ####### ## ## ## ## ##### ## ## ## ## ## ## ####### ####### # # ####### ####### ####### [ Speech For The Defence ] [ By The GNN ] ____________________________________________________________________ ____________________________________________________________________ "SPEECH FOR THE DEFENCE" by THE GNN/DualCrew-Shining/uXu "What is mind? What is matter? Never mind." (unknown) I look around and I see people. Everywhere I look I can see them. They walk the streets of my city, they sit in front of me at the library, they eat lunch at the same restaurant as me. Sometimes, they give me a look but I quickly look away. It is dangerous to stare (and even look) at people in a big city. They might be killers, madmen or just looking for a fight. I walk the streets, watching the sidewalk pass below my feet. I cannot look at people. People are dangerous. At night I sit on my bed, alone. I hear my neighbors chat and play music. Outside, I hear the rumbling noise of passing vehicles. When I tip-toe to the window and look out, I can see neon signs and crowds of people far below me. I live in a very nice flat on the seventh floor. I am rich, but not famous. Some of my friends says that they look up to me and wants to be like me. But in reality, they do not want to. They have no feelings at all. Why am I so successful? Why do I have plenty of money? Why have I never failed? I opened my eyes on the fourth of november in the merciful year of nineteen seventy-three. The year is now nineteen ninety-seven, hence I am twenty-four years old. I believe. I cannot be sure. I cannot be sure of anything around me. You see, I have begun to think. For the first time in my life, I think about the world around me. What is this world? Who am I? Why do I live? My life has been a constant search for more pleasure and more success. I have never ever failed. I have never ever failed. I look around, and I see people who fail. How come that I never fail? Whatever I do, I do it correct. I have a good education which have led me into the so-called good life. The good life consists of money, money and everything that money can buy. I bought my life. I bought my love. I bought my friends. Is it you, is it me - why do I live in ecstasy? It might be reality. But I do not trust that thought. Is this the good life? Yes, it is the good life. I have the power to make people love me and I have to the power to get rid of people who do not want to love me. I have more power than God. Because, I have the money. Jesus might have been able to transform water into wine, but I can buy more wine than Jesus was ever able to drink. I drink the wine of life. It is a sweet liquid, but the more I think about myself - the more the liquid begins to have a slight taste of bitter. I should never have began to think. I should have remained satisfied. Faust, Prometheus and me. We all want to know it all. We do not stay satisfied with out present knowledge. Why? Why! I know things that no one else do. I have used my grey brain to achieve knowledge that is forbidden. I fear people. They are dangerous. They are dangerous because they are not real people. I am a real human being made of flesh and blood. I have a grey brain and a pulsating heart. The shadows around me are not humans. They are machines, made of steel and electronic. Their feelings and thoughts are mechanical, covered by soft plastic that looks and feels just like real skin. They only way to control them is to buy them. They have no souls nor any possibility to think rational. I am the only human being that is able to do that. Is not that funny? I know that I am right about this. I am so positive, that I could die for it. How come that I have never failed? How come that other people are like they are? They are not like me. I am special. I am rich. I am God. But I am also a guinea-pig, placed in a huge vivarium, perhaps watched by a doctor in a white uniform. I want proof. I want to be sure that I am right. Rational thinking is good, but empirical data is alway correct. Perhaps I am wrong. But this feeling is so strong, that I cannot resist to test. I opened the door to my flat, said hello and let her in. She said she had missed me and that she needed to rest. She had worked all day, she said. I watched her fingers and saw a ring that looked exactly like mine. I knew that it was me who had placed the ring there. She went into the kitchen and I followed her. I thought, what should I do, what should I do? I did it. I stabbed her in the back with my boot knife that I had bought this afternoon. She screamed and tried to remove it from her back. She danced around in the kitchen, screaming, screaming, screaming. I stepped back, bit my lip and watched her. She screamed and I covered my ears. She looked at me with frightened eyes and I closed my eyes. After two hours, I looked up. I must have passed out, since, I lied on the kitchen floor. She was in front of me on the floor. Her eyes stared at me. They stared right into my eyes. I must have missed her mechanical heart with the knife, since it took such a long time for her to die. My hands shaked but I had to move her. When she lied on her stomach, I drew the knife out of her body. It was covered with fake blood, like the floor. I need proof! I knew I needed proof. I just had to do one more thing and then I would be completely sure that I was right. I cut her open with the knife and stared into her body. I saw that I was wrong. But sometimes, I know that I am right anyway. I have never ever failed, and I never will. ///////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////// What are you going to do? Sell it on CD-ROM? HA HA HA! Project Runeberg up yours. ETEXT.ARCHIVE.UMICH.EDU /pub/Zines/UXU \\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\ I fought the law, and I won. --------------------------------------------------------------------------- uXu #209 Underground eXperts United 1994 uXu #209 Call UNDERWORLD_1994.COM -> +1-514-683-1894 ---------------------------------------------------------------------------