$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$$$$$ HOLY TEMPLE of MASS CONSUMPTION $$$$$G$$$$$ $SEX$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$U$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$$$ *N*E*W*S* $$$$$$$N$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$$ $$$$DRUGS$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$ Issue #33: Waiter, there's a Shadow in my soup... $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$ the best things in life are F R E E Holy Temple of Mass Consumption http://www4.ncsu.edu/unity/users/a/aiken/ PO Box 30904 SLACK@ncsu.edu Raleigh, NC 27622 StarFleet BBS (919) 782-3095 -------------------------- GREAT Tapes & Muzak Sacrificed to the SLAK HQ ALTAR!! MoFo Outreach Ministry (MOM) - Great source of banned and rare recordings, which they will record for free on your tape + SASE. Includes Negativland's U2/Helter Stupid/Escape, plus the rare Plunderphonic by John Oswald. Also, check out the The Bran Flakes, with "Value vs. Dosage" and "Thinking Allowed". Many other mutant tapes, and industrial/techno mix tapes- and they will also distribute YOUR material too. Send SASE or a stamp to MoFo Outreach Ministry, Box 2704, Reno, NV 89505 [they may be moving the first of the year] CHEWING FOIL - 60 hardcore minutes of industrial/noise and other scary music from a duo using guitar, synth, pinata, samples, and a burning record player. I actually played some of it on Halloween as the theme music for a haunted house, and it scared the shit out of a bunch of kids. Real crazy stufff, lots of fun, too. $6 from Vision Temple, Rev. Carey - PO Box 594, Arcata CA 95518 OPULENCE! Music Sampler - compilation tape of a variety of unsigned bands, from a group in Wilmington NC which sponsors and promotes the independent scene. Hear these bands and more at the WEFESTIVAL, May 22-28, 1997 in Wilmington, with 55 open slots for different bands, tape exchange, zines, independent films, and homebrew beer, and all sort of other doit-yourself things, all done in downtown/waterfront Wilmington. This tape includes bands booked by Opulence, including Brickbat, Breed 13, Inkpot Monkey, and many more. Only $3 for the tape (4 per year for $12) to OPULENCE! PO Box 2071, Wilmington, NC 28402-2071 Bob's Slacktime Funhouse - as heard on WREK 91.1FM in Atlanta GA, on Saturday nights at 1am. Discover the inner secrets of the Universse with Sister Susie the Floozie and Rev. Dr. Nolan Voyde, and their devoted followers. [Also, don't forget the HOUR OF SLACK on at midnight before this show!] This sample from their tape ministries is the 4-13-96 "Vision Quest" show hosted by Rev. Nolan Voyde. Includes white-hot rants, music parodies, barrages, contacts (thanks for the plug!), and the special feature, complete details of Rev. Voyde's torturous trip through time and space itself with "Bob", in which the ultimate horrible secrets of the entire universe are revealed. Listening to this tape will actually induce visions in those who have paid their church membership dues. No price listed, but write about tapes and other neat stuff. Rev. Nolan Voyde, 2970 N. fulton Dr. NE #25, Atlanta GA 30305 Racoon Times-The Tape, and The 2nd Tape - Collection of rare, obscure, and unusual recordings, including some of Bob Nelson's own wild mixes. Includes hard-to-find tracks from Negativland, Cheap Champagne, The Rutles, commercials and theme songs, MAD-TV parodies, selections from the Gumby CD, and lots more. The 2nd Tape has lots of underrated 80s bands with The Suburbs, Flo & Eddie, The Ophelias, plus old beer commercials, all of Negativland's "U2", and other songs from Dr. Demento and elsewhere. Both these tapes are full of fun stuff you won't hear or find *anywhere* else. These 90 minute tapes are $3 each, or available free through MoFo's tape copy deal. Bob also has lots of other tapes; Tons of Negativland's Over The Edge shows, Shock Treatment soundtrack, Flo & Eddie, John Water's Shock Value book on tape, Zappa's 200 Motels, and more. Also, ask about Racoon Times zine. Write to: Bob Nelson, 75 Hale St. #1 Beverly MA 01915 Dads New Slacks Radio Ministry & Tape Exchange Co. - Haven't seen anything from them yet, but write for info: PO Box 4722 Portland ME 04112-4722 USA [Send a tape, get a tape!!] Phineas Narco's Audio/Video Tapes - HUGE selection of wierd and psychotronic audio and video, including Negativland/Over the Edge, The SubGenius Show from KFPA in Berkeley CA with Dr. Howl and Puzzling Evidence, the SubGenius Mutant Theatre 2000 show (parody of MST3K), Cauldron of Agony, The Lucius Tate Calls (what the Jerky Boys *wish* they could do...), MST3K episodes, and tons of other miscellaneous selections. E-mail phin@west.darkside.com for the latest online catalog, or write to: Phineas Narco, PO Box 1247 San Jose, CA 95108-1247 (USA) HOUR OF SLACK - The original gut-busting show available from the Home Orifice. These are continously made, with the latest batch straight from the Slack Crusades. Rants by Rev. Ivan Stang, Dr. K'Taden Legume, and other preachers, with musical accumpaniment by Einstein's Secret Orchestra and others. Only $6 a cassette from SubGenius Foundation. Specify Internet (XXX) or Radio (clean) version for playing on the air in YOUR hometown. Ask for episodes 519 and 520, "Slack Crusades". The SubGenius Foundation,Inc. PO Box 140306 Dallas TX 75214/Fax 214-320-1561/http:/sunsite.unc.edu/subgenius CDs -- Modern Music for Swinging Superheroes - Cartoon Planet Band - This is the house band for Space Ghost Coast to Coast, and the afternoon cartoon show. Space Ghost has conquered all his enemies, and uses them to produce his TV talk show, which is even more abusive to guests than Letterman. The CD is full of silly, yet zen-like profound songs such as "Baloney Sandwich", "Hero In His Own Mind", "Smells Like Cartoon Planet", and much more. Write to Space Ghost at: cartoon.planet@turner.com Hail Satan, Dude: Music From My Goddamn Movies and More!! - by Joe Christ/ Bigger Than God. Original songs and soundtracks from his movies, including "Acid is Groovy, Kill The Pigs", "Sex, Blood, and Mutilation", and the entire soundtrack to his latest film, "Satan's Whore" by Nancy Collins. Wild, flipped-out songs; the "Satan's Whore" tracks feature a dramatic reading from the point of view of a paranoid, racist lunatic out to kill the "Anti-Christ", who he finds with his x-ray vision in the womb of "Satan's Whore" while eating at McDonald's. Not for the squeamish, nor the PC crowd. Available from Reliable Records, 151 First Ave #77, NYC 10003 ------------------- Excerpted from: Get Government off Our Back Regulation: What's it to ya? In 1993, the nation's regulatory system cost Americans $581 billion -- about $5,900 per household per year. Other fun facts: The annual cost of federal regulation is projected to rise to $662 billion by the year 2000. ("CEOs Call for Sweeping Reform of U.S. Government Regulation," PR Newswire, June 21, 1994, citing Thomas D. Hopkins, "Costs of Regulations: Filling the Gaps," Reg. Info. Service Center, Aug. 1992) If the hours spent complying with the tax code were put to productive work, they'd represent the entire annual outputs of the U.S. auto, truck and aircraft industries. (The Dallas Morning News, June 30, 1994) "The Lord's Prayer is 66 words, the Gettysburg Address is 286 words, and there are 1,322 words in the Declaration of Independence. Yet, government regulations on the sale of cabbage total 26,911 words." (Letter from David McIntosh [former member of V.P. Quayle's Council on Competitiveness] to Grover C. Norquist, Oct. 13, 1992) Between 1987 and 1992, the federal paperwork burden increased 261% to nearly seven billion hours, according to the GAO, with tax requirements comprising most of that burden. And regulatory costs tend to hit small business harder than larger companies which "often welcome new regulations because they know the regulations will help consolidate their market share and wipe out small business competitors." (Karen Kerrigan, president of the Small Business Survival Committee, Investor's Business Daily, Sept. 8, 1994) =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-----........ \ OBE-KOF Orgy of Noise WWW Site! \ RACCOON TIMES http://world.std.com/~ObeKOF/ \ c/o Bob Nelson 75 Hale St. \ Apt. 1, Beverly MA OUT of BANd EXPERIENCE (OBE) \ 01915 USA wacko weirdo alien orgy samplefest industroid \ freak-out subversive experimental noise rock trip! | $1/1.50 Can/$2 Foreign (more samples, Stick, electronix, and more SEX) | |------------------------ KINGS OF FEEDBACK (KOF) / industrial blues slack sludge hardcore / GOOD Comix punk heap of noise rock subversion! / check out ("Live" altar ego of OBE..even more Slack) | | the oBliviositeR CALL 1-(617) LICK OBE | 1326-15th St. E. 24 Hour ANSWERING MACHINE / Saskatoon, SK S7N 0R9 for "FREE GIFT" STICKERS and INFO / Canada | Send $10 for OBE/KOF "open your ears" CD | $2 or Trade FNORD ______ / / Bill T. Miller (RevDOK BTM) / ------------------------/ Extraterrestrial Records / Box 221 Boston, MA 02123 USA / SHATTER THE MYTHS ObeKOF@world.std.com / Okay..Relax! You can still get / "Survivor" each month if you act FAST! --------\_________/------------/ All you have to do is send a mere $20.00: / THINKING ALLOWED | Thomas J. Evans, 11-15 45th Ave. | Long Island City, NY 11101-5154 for more information / | That's 24 issues of info-packed, survival- MOFO / related news. You'll also receive a free PO BOX 2704 | bumper sticker, a free "Survivor" patch, and RENO, NV 89505 | a free Terra Libra info-pack and membership. \ Join us NOW for life and freedom! Promote a Value vs. Dosage \ Product whose time is come! | *@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@*@ Classical Literature *** A-Bomb #11 - Interesting robo-sex story; a guy falls in love with a bordello robot and "liberates" her, yet the robot only wants to go back to her owners. Neat story- reminiscent of Ranxerox-in-reverse. Plus, some other, less explicit and much less sophisticated strips. Venus Comics. ** A-Bomb #12 - This issue focuses on a couple of longer stories; one, in which two expert martial-arts vixens fight, then get close, and a young Japanese soldier fondles a captured woman prisoner. This issue just isn't up to the usual quality or uniqueness of most in this series. Venus Comics. **** A-Bomb #13 - Part 2 and 3 of "Sindyr and Company" - great story, with an actual plot. Sindyr and Bronx must rescue Gramps from the evil sorceress who is draining him of his magic by screwing him to death. Lots of action in this one. Plus, vintage b&d pictures from yesteryear. Venus Comics. ***** Cherry #19 - Everyone's favorite party girl/slut takes on two stereotypes in this issue. First, she's upstaged by the ultra-siliconed blonde bimbo twins who will do anything, then she finds out that the big "super-jocks" aren't necessarily proportionally gifted. Plus, more pics of Cherry's Mom, and fan letters. Due to censorship, this is getting harder and harder to get in some places. Cherry Comics. ***** Dawn #4 - Lucifer's Halo part 4: The Gauntlet - Darrien must fight demons, angels, and men, as he reluctantly holds onto Lucifer's halo, and deals with the strange power it has over others. As usualy, the great artwork and heavy metaphysical story from Linsner. Sirius comics. **** Eightball #17 - More strange, disturbing tales include a weird triangle between a gynecologist's estranged wife, one of the doctor's psychotic patients, and an artist who is the wife's lover. Plus, another episode of "Ghost World", both stories exploring the theme "they psychopathology of nostalgia". Really intense emotional issue. Fantagraphics. *** Empty Love Stories #2 - More tales of strange love gone wrong. In "The Quiet Type", a young man falls in love with beautiful coma patients in the hospital. "Another World" is about a UFO conspiracy nut who falls in love with an alien, who postpones the planned global conquest in order to abduct her. In "Mind Game", a girl meets and falls in love with the typical slick bastard who manipulates and takes her for granted- but can *always* get back with her. Slave Labor Graphics ***** Frank #1 - Sept. 1996 - Adventures of the chipmunk-like creature Frank and his strange and sometimes disgusting acquaintances in a surreal land. Possibly the wildest mindfuck available without actually being under the influence of drugs. This one includes two stories: "Hi-Rise Hopper", where Frank takes his "dog" Pupshaw for a walk, and is mutated by a strange little creatures. In "Gentlemanhog", Frank and Jerry the Chicken find some fireworks which they use to play a joke on the disgusting Manhog. He runs far away, and ends up at a man's compound, who takes him in, and educates him; but Frank is in for a shocking surprise when he visits. Fantagraphics Books *** Hate #21 - Lisa finally goes off the deep end with her emotional outbursts, Buddy makes her go to a psychiatrist. She soon quits for another therapist who puts her on Prozac and excuses her behavior. All this comes out during a "joint session" where Buddy call bullshit on the whole deal. In the end, nothing really changes. Also, another "Doofus" strip. Fantagraphics *** Hate #22 - As Buddy's dad seems more and more helpless, Lisa become more and more obsessed at playing "nurse" for him, which leads to tension and a major confrontation between Buddy and Lisa. Things work out though, and Lisa get her act together..when "Dad" gets a burst of energy and goes out for a walk, and gets hit and killed. Its sounding a lot like a soap opera, but just enough real-world angst to make it believable. Plus, Stinky returns in a short where Valerie takes over his lame rock show, turns into a pure bitch, and Stinky get back the show -and revenge. Fantagraphics Books. *** Joe Matt's Peepshow #9 - Totally creepy story of a kid with big problems; if its even halfway autobiographical, it makes you feel sorry for Matt. He just doesn't know how to deal with other people, and comes across as a selfish nerd, which only makes trouble for him- and he ends up getting what he's asking for. Fantagraphics Books. **** Johnny the Homocidal Maniac #5 - A couple try to escape from the depths beneath Johnny's house, while being chased by a horrible creature reminiscent of Friday the 13th. Also, side-stories of angst, murder, and a great dig at the vampire-wannabe crowd. As the pair reach the end, they find that Johnny has been attacked and is dying, but that doesn't stop the monster from getting them. Gruesome, but fun. Slave Labor Graphics. **** Meatcake #6 - More adventures of the strange cast of characters by Dame Darcy, done in her weird, intricate, victorian style. Richard Dirt meets her exact double/doppleganger, and together they play a trick on the Wax Wolf at the boardwalk; Strega Pez plays a trick on Effluvia the mermaid in revenge for her cruelty; and more quirky tales. Lots of fun. Plus, she has her own show on cable access in Manhattan. Fantagraphics Books **** Murder Can Be Fun #2 - Johnny Marr's anthology of death, with individual stories drawn by different artists, as part of an anthology. This one focuses on celebrity deaths, including Brandon Lee, "Alfalfa", Bob Crane, Jayne Mansfield, John Holmes, the nonfatal shooting of Andy Warhol, and the fall of "Fatty" Arbuckle. Sets the stories straight, and debunks some myths too. Slave Labor Graphics. **** Mystery Men Stories #1 - Based on the Mystery Men heroes from Flaming Carrot comics, Bob Burden prsents a limited, text version of a future comic book, although it does have numerous pictures and illustrations. The story follows the adventures of The Strangler, who finishes off the bad guys. And, like the Flaming Carrot, he has plenty of personal quirks of his own. Lots of hardboiled action. Bob Burden Productions. **** Naughty Bits #19 - The war between the sexes heats up, with Kenny arguing that women are too often cold manipulative bitches who play the "victim" guilt trip, and Bitchy returning the charges that men are often concerned only with shallow supermodel-types, and only want to get in women's pants. Things heat up so much that Roberta Gregory even has to take a couple of pages to put things into perspective. Fantagraphics. ** Simpson's Comics #19 - Forced to write a school paper on the town's founder, Bart decides to rig up the founder's statue so that it looks like its crying, a "miracle" like so many others. Immediately, the whole town goes nuts over it, with an entire huckster carnival trying to cash in on the phenomenon. Lisa figures it out, though, and exposes the trick, using Homer's beer instead of the fake tears. Bongo Comics. **** Sunglasses After Dark #3 - Original vampire novel/comic by Nancy Collins. Sonja recalls memories from her earlier human life, and how she was brutally raped and changed. Then, as a new creature, her experiences at various brothels, and how she met the man who proposed to make her into a vampire hunter. Lots of graphic gore. Verotik. *** The System #2 of 3 - The continuing wordless adventure in the corrupt city segues between a racial murder, terrorists assembling an atomic bomb, corrupt police, corrupt insider trading, political scandal, drug turf wars, hackers, strippers, alley killers, and on. All the while, all these little isolated- but related- plots, move along, getting closer and closer to the boiling point. There's so much story in the pictures, words aren't needed. [by Peter Kruper] DC/Vertigo *** Too Much Coffee Man #1 - color special - The superhero whose secret power is that he drinks way too much coffee, in order to stave off angst and depression. With his similarly obsessive/depressed friends, they explore the meaningless of depressed boredom. All drawn by Shannon Wheeler. Adhesive Comics. **** Trailer Trash #7 - The misadventure of total sleazeballs in the wrong side of town. When little Billy swipes a videotape hidden in a pipe, the producers come back looking for it- and him. Billy runs away to avoid them, and joins up with a miserable pair of hoodlums, in order to get a gun to protect himself. Everything screws up; he gets caught and locked in a masoleum. Also features Harvey the pathetic hillbilly. Fantagraphics Books. *** Vamperotica #17 - This series hasn't had a bad story yet- all very original vampire-theme stories, each issue with a story as part of a much larger vampire mythos. This one starts off with the parable "Three Wishes", followed by "Heart and Soul", where the vampire killer Hunter, himself a vampire, becomes involved with streetwalkers and their evil pimps. Also, he is shown to be the vampire queen Luxura's pawn in "Hunter's Blood". Brainstorm Comics *** The Young Witches - Book Two: "London Babylon", issue 6/6 - Sherlock Holmes employs Freud to investigate the strange and perverted "club", and arrive in time to witness the orgy of Walpurgis, where the two virgin witches will be sacrificed to Astarte. Due to Holmes' help, the girls are able to use their powers to break free and avenge their captivity, ending this chapter of the story. Overall, the story condemns the excess and hypocrisy of the Victorian era, and the comic itself is very explicit. Eros Comics. *** Yuppies, Rednecks, and Lesbian Bitches from Mars - In an apocalyptic future, lesbians have taken over the planet Mars and outlawed straight sex- while on Earth, a degenerate-slob leader of the rednecks has declared genocide on all yuppies, who are trying to escape to Mars. A large group of yuppies which has been hiding out in a bomb shelter for several years, and get tangled up in a survivalist's plan to escape. And, of course, lots of raw and very graphic sex- with plenty in the Mars scenes. Good story, too. Eros Comics. **** Zero Zero #9 - May/June 96 - Sammy Smoot gives an interesting drug & cocktail party, by Skip Williamson, plus more serials such as "The Chuckling Whatsit" by Richard Sala, "Fuzz & Pluck" escape their captors by Ted Stearn, and a *great* story from Stephane Blanquet, "The Thing They Call Death". Plus more strange and surreal stories from David Collier, Susan Catherine & Oscar Zarate, covers by Williamson & H. Valium. Fantagraphics Books ***** Zero Zero #10 - July 96 - Truly inspired issue, with lots of little strips by Henriette Valium, with continuing series "The Chuckling Whatsit" by Richard Sala and "Homonculus: Shipwrecked" by Mack White. Plus, a wild set of one-shots by Sam Henderson, Max Andersson, and Mike Diana, who can put more offensive things in a single page than most artists can do in an entire book. Also check out "The Serbian Dreamer" by Aleksandar Zograf. Covers by Drew Friedman and Skip Williamson. Fantagraphics Books. ***** Zero Zero #11 - August 96 - The beginning of a new series by Dave Cooper, "Crumple", set in the not-too-distant future. Also, the murder/ conspiracy mystery "The Chuckling Whatsit" by Richard Sala continues; also "Fuzz and Pluck" by Ted Stearn, with the bear and chicken who escape captivity at the estate, but then must deal with the wilderness. Also, stories "It's a Long Way to the Olympics" by David Collier, about Chinese runners and their torturous, authoritarian training, and "Stubs" by David Mazzucchelli. Plus, other small strips and stories. Fantagraphics Books [give your local comic store a hard time if they don't have the balls to stock these! dogodogodogodogodogodogodogodogodogodogodogodogodogodogodogodogodogodogodogod [HToMC note: "Christmas" and all other wimpy holidays are now CANCELED! Halloween is the ONLY holiday allowed. For the first time in YEARS, this past Halloween was *great*] Hiding Out On Halloween: Videos to Ease the Guilt By Drew Feinberg Halloween is almost upon us, coming quicker than Hugh Grant in a BMW. As Meg Tilly so brilliantly asked in the cinematic disaster known as Body Snatchers, "Where ya gonna go? Where ya gonna run? Where ya gonna hide?" Eloquently, she voices the dilemma of millions of Americans every October 31. I've done them all, with less than optimum results. Let's run through the options, shall we? Okay, first there's trick or treating. Being a greedy bastard and visiting every house within a 20 mile radius, hitting them up for the goods, is socially acceptable as child, but, three years ago, when I was dressed as Zsa Zsa Gabor and asked all of my neighbors to "Give me some candy, DAHLING, or I'll give you a slap," the results were less than desirable. From what I can remember I got assorted candy bars, candy corns, rocks, kitchenware, lollipops, and a jack o'lantern, still lit-- THROWN at me, with great velocity. I can't even spell the names people called me, and I was told to do things to myself that aren't even physically possible, lord knows I've tried. One grandmotherly looking woman was actually kind to me, and gave me some popcorn. My faith in mankind had been restored, that is, until I heard the muffled call to her husband "Come see this poor slow boy. It's lovely to see the mentally challenged out and about." At the tender age of 23, I retired from trick or treating forever. The next year I opted to stay home, watch some scary movies, and give wondrous candy to the the legit trick or treaters. The candy aisle at the supermarket was pure pandemonium. I might as well have been looking for the last green Power Ranger on Christmas Eve. I didn't want to be one of those houses that gave out nickels, fruit, hard bubble gum, cream soda Dum-Dumms that stuck to the paper, black licorice, those awful dark chocolate Hershey's Miniatures, or Smarties. Honestly, do people ever BUY Smarties for themselves? I made a quick scan of what was available, and I saw some variety packs of assorted good chocolate stuff that the others had apparently not seen. I made a mad dash to get two packs. I popped 'em in my cart and very confidently strolled to the checkout counter. The line was huge, and I noticed the elderly woman behind me had nothing in her cart but a box of Metamucil, so I let her go in front of me. I started to sing along with the muzak..."Precious and few are the moment we two can shaaaaaaare..." CRASH! I looked to my side and saw this huge pyramid of canned beets topple over. "Hope that wasn't my singing," I thought to myself, then turned back. Quicker than I could say "The cast of Wings should be sterilized," my treasures were GONE! I was completely bewildered. I was shocked when I looked in the cart ahead of me. The woman I had sacrificed selflessly for, had two bags of assorted chocolates along with her Metamucil. I tried to conceal my anger and kindly said to the woman "Excuse me, I think those are my Halloween candies there." I believe she mouthed the words "Bite me." I walked right up to her cart and reached in and picked up what was rightfully mine. That's when she started bawling hysterically, which caused the entire supermarket to glare in my direction. I was frozen like Jennifer Tilly would be if you aimed a flashlight at her eyes. I was never so furious AND so humiliated; I just stood there with my hand in the metaphorical cookie jar. I slowly backed out of the store, and still candyless, I decided to go to a convenience store, where I bought 50 Chunky bars. A mixture of chocolate nuts and raisins makes my stomach turn, but hey, I didn't have to eat 'em. I had enough Chunky bars to feed a small South American country, or Marlon Brando. I sat down and started to watch Halloween. Before the opening credits were finished, the doorbell rang. "Trick Or Treat," I was greeted by a child and his mother. "Here ya go, fella," I smiled as I handed him a Chunky. The child glowed; the mother frowned. "Michael is ALLERGIC to nuts. Don't you have anything else?" she inquired. "Umm...n-n-no..." I stammered. The mother ripped the treat from her son's hand and handed it back to me, setting Michael into a temper tantrum. "I'm really sorry," I managed to say. "Thank you, thank you VERY much, it was his first Halloween and you ruined it for him. Aren't you proud of yourself?" she sneered as she stormed off. I sighed, shrugged, and went back to my movie. Five minutes later, more doorbell. Two teenage girls dressed up--looked like the girls from Clueless, gum chewing and all. "Like, trick or treat." I handed them two chunky bars, which appalled them. Clueless #1: "Like HELLO, do you KNOW how many grams of fat are in a Chunky? Only like a MILLION!" and she handed it back to me. Clueless #2: "Geez Louise, don't you have any like Snackwells or fat free potato chips?" and deposited El Chunky back in my hand. And so it went all night. Kids whining about chocolate, kids complaining about raisins, kids bitching about options, in 4 hours I got through about 15 minutes of my movie. And got stuck with 45 Chunky bars. Hey, you want a Chunky? Last year I tried another great Halloween option--the costume party. I bopped on down to "Costumes R Us," to rent one, which was oh-so-wise to do on Halloween day. Sparse selection? The place was emptier than Jennie McCarthy's skull. Let me tell you, all eyes were focused when I stumbled in the door as a huge orange box of Tide. I felt about as mobile as Gilbert Grape's mother. I scanned the room and saw assorted Beavises, Ticks, Shannen Doughertys, Newt Gingritches, and one big orange blob. I went straight to the punch bowl and then mingled about. Everybody bored me, and they allseemed to be staring at the monstrosity that was my costume. Then I saw her, the woman I would spend forever with, the woman who wouldn't bitch at me for drinking milk out of the carton. She was a twin of Mia Wallace (a.k.a. Uma Thurman in Pulp Fiction), and she looked me straight in the eye, walked up to me, and what followed was a few hours of engaging conversation; this and my never empty punch cup kept me in seventh heaven. In the middle of debating which was more torture, watching the OJ trial or watching a Mickey Rourke movie, she blurted out "Do you always talk so much before you a kiss a girl?" That was all the invitation I needed. I wrapped my arms around her and kissed. It was just like the movies...the world started to spin in a little circle, like in a DePalma film, except it made me dizzy, and I suddenly realized it wasn't the kiss, but the heavy imbibing at the punchbowl. I lost my balance, which is not a smooth thing mid-kiss. The huge Tide box caused me to stumble and I held my love tight, knowing she would be my rock and prevent my imminent falling, but my feet became entwined with hers and I fell forward, taking Mia Wallace with me. I could see her expresion of horror; the girl I so wanted to impress was being crushed by Mr. Tide himself. I believe the words that she used were "Jesus, I can't feel my legs! I struggled and squirmed, as Batman and Thor managed to pull me off of her, but by then it was too late. Physically, Mrs. Wallace was fine, but she was none too pleased with my squashing her, inadvertent as it was. In fact, everybody at the party just sort of glared and pointed at me until I left in utter shame. No more Halloween parties for ME, thank you very much. Don't walk down the same unpaved road as I did. Learn from my mistakes, my friend. This Halloween, hide out with some friends, turn off on the lights and rent some movies. Try a couple of these, you'll thank me later. Halloween, Nightmare On Elm Street, Frankenhooker, Carrie, The Shining, Evil Dead 2, Dead Alive, Invasion of the Body Snatchers, The Exorcist, and Re-Animator. When the doorbell rings, don't answer it. There's no shame. In fact, I've found that detaching the doorbell all together makes things much more pleasant. And if you turn the volume up really loud, you can't even hear those little fists knocking. -------------------- Drew Feinberg is twenty-something and resides in East Meadow, NY where he is currently a full-time philosopher. He enjoys watching movies and then bitching about them, joining crusades he knows he cannot win, and singing TV theme songs to anybody within earshot especially the "Facts Of Life." Drew and his partner-in-crime, Jen, are starting their 'zine "Marvin Nash's Ear" in the very-near future so they can rant as long as they like to make the world smile and/or think, preferably both. For a free subscription, just send a request and the name of your favorite childhood board game to afeinber@panix.com Andrew Feinberg P.O. Box 90 East Meadow, NY 11554 &%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%&%& WORLD WIDE WEIRDNESS (WWW) Introducing the new HOWARD STERN KING OF ALL MEDIA MORNING PAGE. Look at the 'net through Howard's eyes! There are links to Stern Guests, Pests, Imitators, News, Updates, and of course my Best of the 'Net links. Designed to be your default startup page! http://soho.ios.com/~spomeroy/howlinks.htm ----------------- The Lurker's Guide to Babylon 5 Tons of great B5 info, including complete episode list, plots and analysis, with J. Michael Stracyzinski's own comments nicely arranged and cross-referenced. Includes notes on the making of B5, the setting, characters, and information on stations and airtimes. http://www.hyperion.com/lurk/lurker.html -------------- Official Warner Bros. Babylon 5 Website Includes tons of info, images, audio and video clips, chat areas, and complete episode guide. and message center. http://www.babylon5.com/cmp/base.htm New Babylon 5 site with images & wallpaper . Complete links, plus more http://www.mcs.net/~tvsbrent/ Another B5 page with extensive commentary: http://www.ncf.carleton.ca/~bm846/HomePage.b5.html Babylon 5 Quotes!! http://www.mnsinc.com/ruder/b5/ --------------------- Babylon 5 Newsletter_FREE The Zocalo is a FREE, electronic newsletter devoted to Babylon 5. It can be sent to any Internet mailbox-cuts down on stamps! Each issue contains items like an episode synopsis, character profile, news from around the networks, convention reports/updates, discussion topics (where readers send in their thoughts on a specific topic and they are published in the next issue), etc. We gather items we hope readers will want to see on a regular basis. If you would like to subscribe, send along your first name, state/country of residence and e-mail address to katana@indirect.com. If you aren't sure about subscribing, send me a note at sgbruckner@aol.com or 76642.3664@compuserve.com and I can send along our latest issue for your review. You can then decide whether or not to subscribe. I hope you'll join us. It's fun_and it's FREE. --------------------------- B5 - Shadows Information Office http://www.uk.pipeline.com/~neild/b5_sio.html Get info from the OTHER side of the conflict. Learn that the shadows are actually nice, cuddly, friendly beings who just want to LOVE us! --------------------------- Archie McPhee "Outfitters of Popular Culture" - the ultimate source for great stuff like rubber chickens, plastic bugs, voodoo dolls, fake body parts, strange candy, Chinese death money, and TONS of other unique and fun things. Plus, you can order on-line or get a printed catalog. http://www.halcyon.com/mcphee/ --------------------------- Hell - The Online Guide to Satanism Complete source for the philosophy and religion of Satanism, which is all about indulgence, personal freedom and responsiblity, and rejection of arbitrary authority and doctrine-and has nothing whatsoever to do with the popular mythological notion of human sacrifices, etc. Includes info on the Church of Satan, formed by Anton LaVey in the 60s, the Temple of Set, plus many other local organizations all over the world. Lots of news, book/occult supplies, and links to similar groups. http://webpages.marshall.edu/~allen12/index.html ------------------- YELLO on the net The official homepage of the Swiss digital band Boris Blank and Dieter Meier, who are the pioneers of modern electronic/new wave/techno music. The site includes original samples, part of their recent HOW HOW video, recent interview with Dieter Meier, plus lots of information about the band and their music. (Oh Yeah....) http://newton.Space.NET/yello/ ------------------- A Guide to the work of The Residents Tons of information on possibly the strangest band in the universe, with info on their albums, films, tours. As for uniqueness, nobody comes anywhere close- and this site details their complete history and association with other musicians. Plus, links to other Residents sites. http://www.csd.uwo.ca/Residents/ Ralph Records official Buy Or Die Catalog Including works by the Residents, Snakefinger, and other avant-garde groups. Lots of products from albums, CDs, videos, laser disks, T-shirts, books, and tons of other miscellaneous items. The official source for any and all Residents-related material. http://www.slip.net/~ralpham/ ------------------------- the Timothy Leary Home Page He's dead now, but his homepage is still up, with a guided tour of his home, including the video room, art room, cyber room, and much more. Includes lots of news and articles from the most notorious troublemaker and freethinker ever. http://www.leary.com:8081/ ------------------------- Tres Bizarre Collection of strangeness to be found throughout the web. Lots of neat, interesting, odd, and even totally useless sites, with a "site of the day" and complete archives. http://ucunix.san.uc.edu/%7Esolkode/tres_bizar/ ------------------------- The Grand Holy Unorthodox Church Ironic Realizing that in an age where doctors are killed in the name of "life", where PC goons attack repression with repression, the only thing worth recognition and worship is irony itself. This is the official archives, news, and contact point for this growing pseudoreligion dedicated to finding the ironically absurd. http://www.io.com/~chimera/irony.html ------------------------- If you are interested in knowing more about legal prostitution in the state of Nevada, then point your web browser at the following URL : http://www.paranoia.com/~bashful ------------------------- Digital Hackers Alliance http://www.lochnet.com/client/dha All sorts of technogoodies from the fringes of legality. Includes TONS of software cracks. Virus libraries, anarchy archives, tons of subversive fun. ----------------------- THE WORLD WIDE WEB GUN DEFENSE CLOCK Remember, a few years back, when some guy (who later went to prison for fraud, as I recall) put up the Death Clock in New York's Times Square which clicked off a death from gun violence every two minutes? Well, now anybody with access to the World Wide Web can access The World Wide Web Gun Defense Clock. Starting at 12:00 midnight on January 1st, it starts counting up a gun defense every 13 seconds_which adds up to about 2.4 million gun defenses by the time midnight December 31st rolls around. That's the number of gun defenses the National Self Defense Survey from criminologists at Florida State University found each year in the United States. http://www.netstorage.com/pulpless/gunclock.html Check it out. The Democratic Party was smart enough to put Jim and Sarah Brady on during Prime Time, while the Republican Party is running for cover. We didn't see NRA President Marion Hammer addressing the Republican National Convention, did we? If we're going by cojones alone, the Democrats deserve to win. And they will, unless someone gets the facts out about how guns save more lives than they take by around 20 to 1. The World Wide Web Gun Defense Clock is just one little way of putting "gun violence" in perspective. J. Neil Schulman / Pulpless.Com Voice & Fax: (310) 839-7653 Internet: jneil@pulpless.com Personal Web Page: http://www.pulpless.com/jneil/ Browse sample chapters of new books by bestselling authors, pay online with a credit card or ecash, then download books in HTML or Adobe Acrobat format from the web at http://www.pulpless.com/ ----------------- Joe Christ 's Homepage The producer and director of really-wild independent movies. His latest is "Blood, Sex, and Mutilation", a documentary of interesting modifications that people make to their bodies. Don't miss Genesis P. Orridge's piercings and ritual cutting, Tattoo Mike Wilson, David Aaron Clark, and an unnamed person who went the ultimate route. Also, check out "Acid is Groovy, Kill the Pigs", a pseudo-documentary of the hippie cult that Jeffrey MacDonald claims killed his family. Lots of other movies, CDs, and more, plus check out Joe's US Tour schedule- he might be showing these in YOUR town soon! http://www.taoweb.com/666/joec/ ON THE ROAD: "SEX BLOOD & MUTILATION" starring Genesis P-Orridge, Tattoo Mike Wilson, many others. This is my documentary focusing on extremes in body-modification. "ACID IS GROOVY KILL THE PIGS" One of my "drug-crazed, killers on-the-road" movies, this features the "cult" responsible for killing the family of Capt Jeffrey MacDonald, gobbling blotter & killing folks. "SPEED FREAKS WITH GUNS" Another "drug-crazed killer on-the-road" movie, this time methamphetamine is the drug of choice. Also, I'll be showing a preview clip from one the the two movies I'm currently shooting & editing, "SEX BLOOD & MUTILATION 2". This sequel focuses more on women than the first one did. Here are some venues & dates: Friday, January 24 RICHMOND VA Biograph Theater Saturday, January 25 ASHEVILLE NC The Pink Friday, February 7 GARNER NC The Caboose Saturday, February 8 SAVANNAH GA Bay St Bar -------------------------------------------------------- Oh Lord, won't you buy me a Republican My friends all own Congress, I must make amends No cash in my trust fund, no big dividends Oh Lord, won't you buy me a Republican ---------- GET AHEAD! GET SEVERAL HEADS! Read: THE MONGOLOID MOOSE Sample Issue More truthful than the Warren Report! $1 More fun than a living severed head! Tastier than a big bucket o' glaze! Just High Tech enough to piss off the Amish! c/o Scott Wilson, PO Box 642, Bloomfield NJ 07003 +-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+-+ ZINE-MANIA [Lots more listings real soon, too! Thanks to the people who have flooded me with TONs of great stuff] ABWoF - Stands for "A Back Water of Fandom", from the ashes of Dan Harper's RoMSFaFiNA, is still primarily about science fiction literature, but delves much deeper into the general "fandom" aspect of it, That, being, those who aren't members of the "official" clubs, but just enjoy their own little corner of the it. This issue, he looks at anti-censorship messages in scifi, (and how movies can have different, even memorable, departures from the book) a personal diary and mini-review of Boskone 33, plus other musings on books, culture, and his favorite authors. Makes a nice complement to Arthur Hlavaty's Derogatory Reference zine. Available for "The Usual" or editorial whim. Dan Harper, PO Box 194, Concord MA 01742-0194 danlharp@aol.com Aggressive Christianity Missions Training Corps (ACMTC) - They regularly send out a big stack of newspaper-magazines, way out on the "christian nation" fringe. They also have their own compound somewhere way the hell out in the middle of nowhere, where they have a pseudo-military organization (with themselves titles of Major Generals), for the purpose of taking over society [peacefully, according to the disclaimers]. They are big on end-times rapture &nd prophecy, but I can't see much anti-NWO influence. The papers themselves are great examples of hardcore fundie rants, and well worth it for the *tons* of great clip-art alone. They'll probably send it all for the asking: ACMTC Library, PO Box 90, Berino NM 88024, prophet@cibola.net http://www2.cibola.net/~prophet Archie McPhee - Color catalog - The "outfitters of popular culture", this is the ultimate source of all kinds of strange, unusual items, toys, geegaws, rubber animals, and anything else you can imagine. Whether its rubber chickens or pink flamingos for the yard, cricket-flavored lollipops, voodoo dolls, original fallout shelter signs, "Bob" mugs, Elvis playing cards, and tons more. You gotta get some of this stuff. Archie McPhee & Co., PO Box 30852, Seattle WA 98103. Info/order: 206-745-0711 email: mcphee@mcphee.com web: http://www.halcyon.com/mcphee/ Cato Institute - 1996 catalog - Books, journals, and papers on a wide variety of public policy issues, from the famous Washington DC think-tank that is responsible for much of the successful lower-tax/less gov't policies of the current Republican congress- but its actually undercover Libertarians. Although they seem "conservative" on most fiscal issues, they're also against the stupid War on Some Drugs, and advocate individual liberty in a way that the Repubs can only dream about. 800-767-1241, Cato Institute Books, 938 Howard St., Suite 202, San Francisco, CA 94103 Derogatory Reference #81 - Arthur Hlavaty's thoughts/journal on Sci-Fi literature, mixed in with whatever else he feels is important or is happening to him at the time. Being recognized as an authority and published in various SF references, I admit that I'm not familiar with many of the authors he talks about, except for some of the more popular ones like Philip K. Dick, Heinlein, etc. Plus, he gives his thoughts on things like political correctness, health problems, big business, and more. Print version is $1, or trade or email. Arthur D. Hlavaty, 206 Valentine St., Yonkers NY 10704-1814 hlavaty@panix.com Devil Boy Comics #2 - Godvirus issue - Hardcore, gory, punk sci-fi comics and stories. Profusely illustrated, in a style similar to Eric York of Hungry Maggot. Plenty of raw violence, but gets quite psychological too. The title cartoon "Devil Boy" is about a small demon that controls the Devil Boy, and prepares him for a life of debauchery and carnage. Look for these arond various Seattle area bars, as well as the zine "Mansplat", and comic conventions in Washington state. Send SASE for catalog and some free Devil Boy stickers, maybe a little extra for the zine, to: V.Blast 4742 42nd Ave. SW, Suite 354, Seattle WA 98116 The Dial #5 - One-stop shopping for the best subversion in town. Each "channel" has a different article, most of which are taken from other zines and sources, but put together for dramatic effect. Includes an interviews with arsonists & smugglers, an article on 100 drunken Santas on a rampage in SF, basics of lockpicking, sneaking alcohol into sporting events, your rights regarding police searches, and creating confusion. Also has zines/music and a nice section on the SubG/Discordian cults, with instructions on how to perform the Turkey Curse. $2, 4/5$: The Dial Pressworks, PO Box 38126-830 Dallas TX 765238 Tons more tips and tricks are on: http://www.math.grin.edu/~gibson Of course, these are for entertainment purposes only. Drapetomania! - Premier issue (meaning, the uncontrollable urge to escape from freedom) [name is also being changed due to conflicts] The basic premise, like the name, is about being free enough to live among others, and having fun in the process; with the zine being a source of knowledge to help accomplish this goal. Lots of practical info on recycling, improvising, paying off bills, using computers, book review (Whole Earth Catalog in this issue), and a lot more, including the complete "Declaration of Independence of Cyberspace" by John Perry Barlow. $3, Charles Alfred "Al" Human, 505 Woodlawn St., Suite #229, Belmont NC 28012 liberty@clt.mindspring.com Dream Scene magazine #5 - This is the final edition of Dream Scene, which is, quite literally, people's dreams, plus dream-inspired and relevant artwork, and even some dreams illustrated in cartoons. It's a wild trip too, with many of them rivaling any psychedelic ever done on purpose- and there's no analysis, just unfiltered description, in the dreamer's own words. This is an extra-big issue, since its the last, and back issues are available for $4.00. Its a shame that this is the last, but they've all been a lot of fun. Write to: Dream Scene Magazine, 3902 folsom Street, San Francisco, CA 94110-6138 Factsheet 5 - #60 - Another huge issue- a must have for anyone who produces a zine, and highly recommended for anyone who likes to read them. This issue has lots of good, practical info. Tells how to cash those checks made out to the zine, Mary Fleenor tells how to avoid the psychopaths that you might attract, plus a debate on zine quality- and how to avoid the pitfalls that make some lame. As usual, tons of listings of zines, cartoons, albums, and art that you can't find anywhere else. 6 issues $20. Factsheet Five, PO Box 170099, San Francisco, CA 94117-0099 The Fisico Nuclear Experience - Sept. 1996 - More strange adventures of the masked wrestler/physicist/magician with wierd powers and weirder wrestling opponents, as they fight and practice high tech/black arts all over the country. This zine chronicles the different stories, schedules, and events. of El Fisico Nuclear. Real nice looking booklet form now, too. $8/6 to Viva la Lucha Publications, PO Box 937, Brea, CA 92622-0937 Lyger@aol.com Giants & Little People in Fact and Fiction #7 - The next issue will be the last of this particular zine, where Bob Nelson explores the genre of size- both midgets and dwarves, and giants. This particular issue concentrates on this genre in comics, comic books, and cartoons, with lots of examples. Also, more updates on midgets/giants in movies and TV shows, plus a large section on real stories of midgets, including midget rap and gospel groups, the famous actor Billy Barty, and the tragic story of Herve Villechaize. $1 to bob Nelson, 75 Hale St. #1, Beverly, MA 01915 GrooVee CheeWaWa #1 - Another zine from Austin Texas, which shares the mailing address with Lost Armadillos in Heat, and probably people as well. There's lots of Texas-oriented stuff (including the legendary Austin music scene), like LAIH, but also some great rants, jokes, and other articles from the point of view of a city and culture that never really left the late 60s. It's a fun scene, if you've ever been there, and this zine gives a really good picture of what its like to live there. $2 to Lost Armadillos In Heat 113 West 31st Street, Austin TX 78705 Hungry Maggot #5 & #6 - Highly recommended. Chock full of conspiracy info, disgusting comics, strange movies and stranger zines, wild articles, and especially, the tons and tons of great artwork by Eric York and others. The dominant theme is horribly mis-shapened monsters committing unspeakable acts- which makes the zine live up to its mission of "high weirdness and low culture". I especially liked the "Hell Kitty" cartoon parody of "Hello Kitty". Also, lots of ads and info on other zines in the same extreme style. Only $1 each for a thick zine to: Eric York, 2912 N. Main #1, Flagstaff AZ 86004 Illicit Underground - V1#1 May/June/July 96 issue - I had heard that there is a growing underground/alternative culture in Pennsylvania, but I never saw anything from it until I got this zine. There seems to be on helluva scene, and IU captures it quite nicely. Excellent technical production, plus all the chaos, artwork, rants, and info you'd expect from a GenX/Libertarian/ underground magazine. Also, with a "zine within a zine",they have a special, independent secttion on sci-fi and role playing games. Lots of fun, and indispensible for anyone living in the South-central PA area. $1/issue (checks to Round Table Enterprise) Illicit Underground Magazine, PO Box 7486 Lancaster PA 17604-7486 IllicitU@aol.com Jay Harber - Notes From Oblivion - Free in exchange for audiotape or SASE. Jay suffers from a degenerative eye disease, and isn't able to read zines, but he loves to listen to them on tape. Plus, he'll trade his zine and other works in exchange for tapes. Tape someone reading your zine aloud, and send it to him for free by printing "Free matter for the blind and Phys. Handicapped" on the outside. Jay Harber, 626 Paddock Lane, Libertyville, Il 60048 JND Pseudo Zine - Not exactly a zine "issue", each one is unique, and pulled together from a lot of different and constantly changing sources. Ranges from heavy philosophical essays and debates, to music, movies, zines, fringe resources, and other interesting bits. Very pro-libertarian, eclectic orientation, and interesting explanations of the Buddhist philosophy that JND also practices. Great lists too- possible source for collectors and trades. No price listed, but he seems to like trades: JND Pseudo Zine PO Box 613, Redwood Valley, CA 94570 Laissez Faire Books -Huge selection of books on liberty, lots of "conservative" material, but overwhelmingly oriented to the more libertarian positions on economics, education, censorship, gun control, and law. On the Internet, subscribe to the list at BookNews@LFB.org for new books reviews, or order online at orders@LFB.org. web: http://www.LFB.org 800-326-0996 938 Howard Street #202, San Francisco, CA 94103 Liberty Tree books - Big source of political works, focusing on the writings by and about the US founders. Also, with books on many other current political topics; a mixture of right-wing/conservative and libertarian-oriented works. Lots of good stuff for anyone concerned about the government and societal decay, with stuff ranging from dry analysis to PJ O'Rourke to Paladin Press. 800-927-8733 - The Independent Institute, 134 - 98th Ave. Oakland CA 94603 Mongoloid Moose #22 - The big news this time is the death of the Bullet Proof Hyundai, featured in adventures in many previous issues. Also in this issue is the return of Major Stress, who takes aim at the "children", who are in reality, a lot less "innocent" than people believe. Plus, Doug gets taken for granted by a girl who casually exposes herself to him, Scott indulges in the wonders of NyQuil, and much more. $1 or anything you can put in an envelope: Scott Wilson, PO Box 642, Bloomfield NJ 07003 MongoMoose@aol.com Mongoloid Moose #24 - Adventures in fast food, with one of Scott's friends who always manages to screw up everything, plus Major Stress tackles the clueless workers at roadside diners. Comics in this issue too, with the main story, a reiew of a recent Foo Fighters concert in NY, which turned out to be a real war story. Plus, Strange but true news, and much more. $1/trade to: Mongoloid Moose c/o Scott Wilson, PO Box 642, Bloomfield NJ 07003 Michael Burnette Productions - 96/97 catalog - Professional-quality special effects and makeup, props, and kits good enough to use in YOUR scifi/horror film. Dissect your own Area 51 alien! Skulls, aliens, monsters, mummies, skeletons, corpses, and complete make-up to create any gory injury or mutation you like, with how-to books. http://www.web-space.com/MBP MBP Inc. PO Box 16627, North Hollywood, CA 91605 NCSE Reports - Spring 1996 - News journal from the National Center for Science Education, which actively fights the attempts by fundamentalists to teach religion in public schools under the disguise of "creationism". This issue analyzes Internet resources on evolution, review of a book which debunks Darwin's alleged deathbed conversion, trash pseudo-science shows on network TV, news from school boards around the country, and tons of references and resources. NCSE membership is $25/year which includes 4 issues of NCSE Reports, 2 issues of Creation/Evolution, and book discounts. NCSE, PO Box 9477, Berkeley, CA 94709-0477 http://www.NatCenSciEd.org Neighborhood Threat Comics #3 - another mini-comic from Kill City Graphics. This one has bunches of small 1 and 2-page strips, including Alternative Math, which explains modern "alternative rock" in mathematical terms of old hippies, and old bands; Dave's Laws (like Murphy's), The Snoodletons discover the cross-generational appeal of punk music, and lots more. This comic changes its title every issue, named after Iggy Pop songs. Also check out the Barefoot and Pregnant comics, and the subgenius journal HeadLines. Only $1 each from Dave Mitchell, PO Box 5094, Winter Park, FL 32793-5094 The Obliviositer issue # 10101 - A brief bit of time off from the "True Army Tales", for a special "Working For The Man" episode, focusing on low-pay, hard working jobs supervised by insecure assholes. Just about everyone has had at least one of these jobs from hell. Tim tells about the jerks he works for at the screen-printing shop, Yul Tolbert tells of working at McDonald's (the horror!), Sean Fehrenbach recalls the terror of delivering pizzas for Dominos, with other strips by Robin Bougie, Adam Larson, and more. This is turning out to be a big issue with enough material to rival the "professional" comics, and much better than the comics in any newspaper. $2 each or 6/$10 to: Tim Brown, 1326-15th St. E., Saskatoon, SK S7N 0R9 Prometheus Books - Fall 96/Winter 97 catalog - Huge selection of critical, often heretical, books which investigate every untouchable subject. New release include "All-American Monster", an unauthorized biography of Timothy McVeigh, "The Case Against School Vouchers", "Evangelicals at the Ballot Box", "Weird Water and Fuzzy Logic", the latest from Martin Gardner, and tons more. No iconoclast should be without this handy catalog. 800-421-0351; Prometheus Books, 59 John Blenn Dr., Amherst NY 14228-2197 Raccoon Times #3 - Fall 96 - Furry Zine, which deals with the comic genre where animals are substituted for humans. This issue details lots of these comics, lots from Antartic Press. Plus, other "normal" features such as zine, movie, and music reviews, the furry ficiton "Planet of the Raccoons", and more. $1 from Bob Nelson, 75 Hale St., Apt. 1, Beverly MA 01915 Bob is no longer producing "NegativFan"; it has been resurrected as NegativFanboyLand, $1 from Don-O, PO Box 5681, Santa Monica, CA 90409 The Scroll - Volune 11 Issue 4 - Newsletter of the UNCC Science Fiction and Fantasy Guild - Lots of scifi info, convention information, and general gaming information in the Southeast region. Includes contact information for gaming clubs in the area, stories, and technical info for expanding and playing a multitude of different role playing games. RonMcClung@aol.com, UNCC SGA Clubs & Organizations, Univ of NC, Charlotte NC 28223 Second Renaissance Books - Summer 1996 - The official source of books and material on Objectivism, the philosophy created by Ayn Rand, and other pro-reason authors. The feature is "The O.J. Verdict" by Leonard Peikoff, which traces the philophical "ivory tower" ideas that led to OJ's acquital. Also, tapes from Peikoff's successful radio showon KIEV-AM in LA, which explore applications of these ideas. 800-729-6149 74222.2330@compuserve.com Second Renaissance Books, 143 West St., New Milford CT 06776 Skeptical Inquirer - March/April 1996 - The new format looks great- full color, just like regular magazines. This issue's big story is about the military's 20-year, 20M$ program on psychic spying. The result- a complete flop, waste of time and taxpayer money. Carl Sagan has an essay about the relationship of truth to science, pseudoscience, and ultimately, civilization itself. Plus, an exploration of the historical claims of vampires, versus fictional accounts, and lots more. Great for keeping your bullshit detector charged up. $4.95 single issue, $32.50/year (6 issues) - Skeptical Inquirer, Box 703, Amherst NY 14226-0703 Survivor - Vol. 8 #2 - Like the Jan 96 issue, this one reprints large sections of timely -and needed- info from the Libertarian party. This one has the special report on the LP, detailing the libertarian philosophy in general, how they would handle things quite differently than they are now, and their stand on the issues. Much of this may be old hat to people familiar with the LP, but there's lots of people who have never heard of it, and this reprint is a great way to become familiar with it. Plus, more survival/preparedness/ self-suffiency info, hard-hitting political cartoons, and tons of contacts. Donation to: Evans, 11-15 45th Avenue, Long Island City, NY 11101-5154 Survivor - Vol 8 #4 - Every square millimeter packed with great info, ads, contacts, and tons of on-target political comics. Lots of good info from the survival/preparedness field, how to be thrifty/independent, and info to keep up with the government's nefarious schemes. A special in this issue reveals the gov't plan to seize and ultimately ban automobiles with draconian "emissions testing", which is actually just another property grab and power increase. Plus, lots of zines & slackness, comics, and other alternative info. Recommended. Sugg. $2 donation to: Evans, 11-15 45th Ave. Long Island City, NY 11101 Ticket to Hades #3 - Small, 8-page zine given out at Dragon Con 96, has miscellaneous humor, quizzes, and funny lists that poke fun at cons and the types of people they attract. Given out free, they suggest $1 to mail it and back issues. Mad Dog Ink, PO Box 60213, Savannah, GA 31420 Trouble - Twisted comics by Jerry Collins, *definitely* for adults only. There's quite a bit of "furry" characters, lots of latex, mechanoid warriors, sinister characters, plus fun with "Bob" being disciplined in the furry pleasure dungeon. $3.50 from Wildcat Press, Box 167, 48 Shattuck Square, Berkeley CA 94704 - also ask for their catalog of furry, subgenius, and other zines. The artist, Jerry Collins, who does tons of great SubGenius art, is also looking to contract out drawings- watch HToMC for samples of his artwork. He is at: 111 Victor Circle N.W., Atlanta, GA 30314-2125 The Twilight Zine VI - on the front line in the battle against the alien conspiracy, this is full of comix, reviews, artwork, and stories, much of it in the general outer space/aliens motif, with a Capt. 9-Ball comic. It concentrates mainly on the comics and art, with a few poems and a small review section, and scattered oddities, such as a great ballot for electing a new Pope. $2 from The Twilight Zine, c/o Andrew, PO Box 85581, Tuscon, AZ 85754-5581 the Watcher - Summer 1996 - Journal of the Order of Shaitan, the Baltimore- based successor to the Church of Satan. Lots of contact info, books, tapes, and ads for other covens and related groups. Also included is lots of real newspaper articles of violence, corruption, riots, rapes, etc.- evoke a weird mood much like that new "Millenium" show- plus fring mysteries as revealed by Dr. Franklin R. Ruehl. As a whole, its better than TV for showing the decay of society- and the pitiful attempts of the fundie "prayer warriors" are duly noted- which are, more often than not, thinly disguised grabs for money and power. As a whole, this is a good focal point for active satanic/thelemic groups. Single issue $6, annual $23- Gargoyle Prod. Magister Ron Mephisto, S.P., 708 S. 51st St. Baltimore MD 21224 The West Virginia Surf Report #12 - Lots of random commercial/stream of consciousness bits mixed together, with stories and other short bits. The "art house funnyz", regular cartoons with the punchline left off so as to render that hip, strange, and ambiguous feel of so much "art". Plus, a tour diary with an (obviously fake) punk band was quite clever and actually on- target. Plus, rants, and assorted oddities, which tend to go for the confusion effect. 12 pages/$5 per issue, but he also trades for equivalent- sized zines. WV Surf Report, PO Box 43662, Atlanta GA 30336-0662 !-!-!-!-!-!-! BLESSED ZEALOTS !-!-!-!-!-!-! The Stark Fist of Removal - Interim Update #723 - Latest news from the front lines of the war on normality. Includes the latest Price List of the Gods with everything you just can't do without. Burn this information into your cortex with the hottest laser in town: The SubGenius Foundation, PO Box 140306 9Dallas TX 75214 - slack@metronet.com http://sunsite.unc.edu/subgenius Devival hotline: 216-556-0338 Read >>> alt.slack <<< HEADLINES - Journal of Subgenius happenings from the deep south, from Rev. Dr. St. Dave Mitchell, Pastor of the 1st Mobile Church of Bay Hill. - with real kook news, increasing instances of "Bob" in the actual mass media as we approach 1998, and actual weirdness around the world. Also lots of bulldada and original rants. Your complete guide to the underworld for $1/trade to Dave Mitchell, PO Box 5094, Winter Park, FL 32793-5094 Obloquy - #4 - Takes a jaundiced look at the mountains of pure garbage that the Internet is becoming, as antisocial twits trade volumes of meaningless drive. [and woe be unto anyone who fails to log onto the official Subsite at http://sunsite.unc.edu/subgenius/] Back to reality, it also has a review of the Slack Crusade's visit to Ground Zero in Minneapolis, more weird news, an interview with Demi Moore's nipples, zines, rants, schlock, prophecy, and a review- as much as its possible to put into words, of "Tetsuo: The Ironman". Lotta stuff in a small package. Send $1 or something to: obloquy, PO Box 5902, Wilmington NC 28403-0789 http://www.rlabs.com/obloquy So What? #11 & #12 - Official digest of the Temple of Holy Electronic Media & Unadulatered Slack (THEMUS) which advicates much MORE television watching instead of less, elevating it to a truly holy practice. Lots of great regular features including Bil Keane Must Die (plus dysfunctional Family Circus), Why I Hate Blockbuster Video, 23 Watch, Celebrity Corpse Update, and the ever-popular and highly blasphemous Crazy Christian Conspiracy Comics. Rev. Groovy G. rants and raves about the shows on the sacred CRT (don't forget B5's KILLER new season...), and both of these issues go into the latest SubG schism, with the formation of the Eastern Orthodox Church of the SubGenius, under the 12-gauged leadership of Rev. K'Taden Legume. Indispensible, with tons of SubG news & info. $1 "Love" donation, stamps or trade to: so what? PO Box 378, Richmond VA 23218 Vision Temple - Tons of fun stuff in every mailing, plus lots of great performance/mail art projects that *you* can join in. Currently, he's compiling a tape of music and mail celebrating the life of Dr. Tim Leary. Plus, in his great price list, he offers music by Chewing Foil, Watching the Skies, plus more by MoFo, free artwork for cd/tape covers, a *fantastic* deal for punches in the eye ($1), and more. Free strange ads, and cartoon booklets too. Send anything and everything to (note the new address): Rev. Carey, PO Box 594, Arcata, CA 95518 USA The Sinner's Bible - Continuing the proud tradition of High Weirdness by Mail and Asylum for Shut-Ins, this is the latest, most up-to-date journal of the truly weird and twisted bulldada available, in categories ranging from tax protesters, pirate radio, UFO/NWO conspiracy, fringe technology, kinky lifestyles, comics, psychedelia, magick, satanicka, and the truly slack. Tons of pictures and illustrations, its much more focused on the extreme scene than the more general (but also recommended) Factsheet Five. Definitely a must-have for a CHEAP $3 from Sticky Green, PO Box 27663, LA CA 90027-0663 email: sticky@wavenet.com The Bigfoot Banner - Dobbs is actually a Sasquatch- in this church bulletin which reveals the true Yeti-inspired roots of the SubG cult. Sightings, Yeti virus attacks, cartoons, and actual questions answered by the Holy Bigfoot himself. Bigfoot HQ, 3025 6th St., Tuscaloosa AL 35401 ----------- Also Recommended High Slack/$$$ value: OGYR NETWORK PO Box 53 $2 sample copy Plainfield, IL 60544 Internet: Saint_Andrew@anl.gov or stumattheadand@vax.colsf.edu Editor: $aint @ndrew I Asst Ed: Pope Phred MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM Hey! If you're reading the ASCII text version, you're missing out on the great artwork by: Jerry Collins Dave Kocher 111 Victor Circle NW -AND- 4506 Darcie Dr. Atlanta, GA 30314-2125 Erie, PA 16506 -AND- GAK PO Box 21144 Philadelphia PA 19114-0344 They do great stuff for zines!!!! ------------------ Holy Temple of Mass Consumption slack@ncsu.edu PO Box 30904 BBS: 919-954-5028 Raleigh, NC 27622 http://www4.ncsu.edu/unity/users/