[--------------------------------------------------------------------------] ooooo ooooo .oooooo. oooooooooooo HOE E'ZINE RELEASE #546 `888' `888' d8P' `Y8b `888' `8 888 888 888 888 888 "Nobody Loves a Dishwasher" 888ooooo888 888 888 888oooo8 888 888 888 888 888 " by Unrelated 888 888 `88b d88' 888 o 4/3/99 o888o o888o `Y8bood8P' o888ooooood8 [--------------------------------------------------------------------------] I have been trying to find a job for about the past month or so. Almost everyday, well, once a week, I'd get up and go out and put in applications looking for work. Well, there's a Holiday Inn downtown where I live and I had put in an application about three weeks previous, and I would go and check on it every 3 or 4 days. Whenever I went in the manager had always been busy, well, not last Thursday. They had lost my application but went and got the manager for the kicthen. I was hired as a dishwasher on the spot, I started Monday. My first day there went by extremely fast. When I first got there the first employee I met started searing about something to do with a customer. The next people I met were the managers who all seemed to be high on coke or something because they all said nice to meet you and "how's it going?" like I had known them for 5 years with their plastic smiles and "frilly" grins. And when I actually got into the kitchen, I found out that the garbage disposal was busted and we had to use a garbage can, the actual dishwasher had to be shut off every 5 minutes or so because something's screwy with it, and everyone was making fun of the dishwasher who had been there for 6 years. "He kind of reminds me forrest gump on speed". The second day there about halfway through the day one of the waitressess had ultra sound pictures of her unborn fetus. *DISGUSTING*. I had mentioned that birth was repulsive and made me nautious. She replied something like "IT's a Beutiful and Natural thing!!!" rather vehemently. Then, Randy, gump on speed, started asking if he could be the godfather, or if that she'd name the kid after him. I also asked if I could be the godfather, but nobody heard me. I overheard the pregnant waitress talking about the dirty little fetus most likely being a boy. So, I asked, a little louder this time, "could I be there, you know, with a catchers mit and a baseball bat." The third day, Wed., I got bitched at because I was slow, well, dammit, I had a right to be. I hadn't been to bed at all that night and was extremely tired. Nothing exciting really happened until the end of the day when I had went downstairs to take out the garbage, FUN FUN! (I'm being sarcastic here). As it should be, the damn bag wieghed about 75 or more pounds, so when I finally got it out of the actual can, and over to the dumpster, BAM!, everything tore out of the bottom and all over the ground and my bots. The funny thing is, this was GREAAT!!! (again, being sarcastic). No shovel, no brrom, just a small dustpan to clean up the whole mess.... Now, today, well, it started off fine you know, every day bull shit, except, as I failed to mention previoiusly, anything that went wrong, was the dishwashers fault, and because I'm the new guy, I get bitched at about everything. Where's the ice scooper? Change the water, can you get this for me, have you seen this? do you know and blah blah blah blah..... Well, after about an hour after I was there the cook (female) and another waitress (the pregnant one) came up and said, "hey, your zippers down. Now, I thought this kind of odd seeing how I WAS WEARING AN APRON, and of course they both started laughing. I felt moronic. I did however get it later, they were checking me out when I checked my zipper, SEXUAL HARRASSMENT!! Then, about another hour or so later they asked me if I knew where my back pocket was, they again just wanted to check out a part of my anatomy. I said, you just want to check out my ass, and they both (the cook and the pregnant one) started laughing. Oh yeah, and between those two comments the cook said sexual harrassment is the best harrassment. Can't argue with that, so, in reply, rather loudly not realizing the manager was only 15ft away from me I asked the pregnant one "So, what color are your nipples, pink, or brown?" She asked "WHAT?!" I looked over saw the manager, and thought, "shit." *0$# "Come with me, now!" I went into his office and he yelled at me about sexual harrassment, not beating kids in the delivery romm with baseball bats or talking about it, and being slow the day before. I explained to him the comment, being dead ass tired, and how they had started it. Good thing I have the day off tomorrow. No one even acknowledges my pressence there anymore. I even over heard various people whispering the "sexually explicit comment" I had made. They all hate me and it only took 4 days... it at least took "gump on speed" 6 years... Those lonely dishwasher blues, or should I say pink or browns... [--------------------------------------------------------------------------] [ (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS! HOE #546 - WRITTEN BY: UNRELATED - 4/3/99 ]