'##::::'##:::'#####:::'########: VIVA LA REVOLUCION! CERDO DEL CAPITALISTA!! ##:::: ##::'##.. ##:: ##.....:: =========================================== ##:::: ##:'##:::: ##: ##::::::: THE HELOTS OF ECSTASY PRESS RELEASE #391 !! #########: ##:::: ##: ######::: ZIEGO VUANTAR SHALL BE MUCH VICTORIOUS! !! ##.... ##: ##:::: ##: ##...:::: =========================================== ##:::: ##:. ##:: ##:: ##::::::: "plaZa auTomatIon" !! ##:::: ##::. #####::: ########: by -> Trilobyte !! ..:::::..::::.....::::........:: 12/28/98 !! !!========================================================================!! Where's the pooty-tat? Where's the pooty-tat? Where's the pooty-tat? I taught I taw a pooty-tat. Oh, it's inside my phone. C'mere, phone. You're a good phone, you've never done me wrong. For as long as I've had you, which has only been so long, you've been good to me and haven't let me down. The phone company pours electricity through the phone lines. If I put you underwater in a big bathtub and you were next to my head, would I get electrocuted? I love, love, love you, phone! I love you. I love other things; I love the stars at night and I love sticking my tongue to tasty things and I like to beat you, phone, beat you into metal walls. We used to have more metal walls around here, me and Metra, but see, they were lead-based, and when we gave birth to you we were afraid you might lick them and get sick. After all, we coated them with rabbit feces. I like to return books to the library because I feel like I have a purpose. When I return them on time, I feel like a good kid, and I know the librarians respect me. Think of how many important books may have been lost from important libraries because some dingbat checked them out and never returned them. There shouldn't be a swinging door for those sorts of people. It should just go one way. A one-way road into a room full of punishment, where all they can do is lick things all day. They can lick themselves until their skin goes raw or they can lick the walls and get sick of lead poisoning, like mom -- good 'ol mom, baking her iron-supplemented chocolate cookies. My friends would always have christmas cookies with fake sugar-coated metallic balls on them. Their moms made them. Well, my lovely mother (I love the woman!) she put real ball bearings on them thinking that we could eat them all and we all got sick and shit out ball bearings. When I get bad intestinal gas, I can bend over and my ass is like a Daisy BB gun. Look out Martha Stewart. I could cook culinary delights for french stalwarts of Egyptian theatre. The tops of the pyramids are not comfortable to sit on, for members of either sex. Sure, the pointy top of the pyramids have all worn away over the years, but still, you're awfully high up and it is an uncomfortable climb and I used to be buried in one of those pyramid things but then I got out because the light shone on me in just the correct way. god loves me, because god loves everyone (even you) and I am part of everyone (and so are you). Where's my phone? I have to go downstairs and use the payphone. Hold on. ... Haha. I went down stairs to use the payphone and realized my good loving phone was in my hand! What a kind phone, to appear in my hand right when I need it most. What else could I ask for in a companion? Now only if the people I talked to on the phone were actually decent people worthy of spending my time with me. I should stop spending my time and start selling it. But then cheap ass bastards like Smoki would never come round no more. He liked the smorgasbord in Madison, WI when we went up there to have his fur removed. He was a nice creature until his fur got all chopped off and you could see his skin and it was so bad. I think he was part dove, horse, and sea anemone. I could be wrong. It's time for my daily calculus exercise. I like to look literate when I write these, you know. I feel like I'm touching a woman's skin as I type this to you. The keyboard feels like a woman's skin. Womens' skin is good. Women are good. I like Women. Calculus. Woman. Calc -- I will go dress up, I say, and I got dressed and went outside and HEY I've got boobs now. I always get violated with them. Between people looking at them and old men groping them, I never know what to do. "when ever you come around i'm a walkin' on shaky ground" that's how you make me feel -- you make me want to shake the ground. I want to go through the throes of personal and fulfulling love with you, my angel, my poopheart, my fucking blistery fungus. mmm. I will melt wax on your stomach and then cut it off with a sharp knife. I will chew on your hair and scalp until your whole head is gooey with my thick saliva. I will squeeze your thigh until my hands have kneaded the fat enough that it will slink down your leg and come out between your big toe and its toenail. I will pinch your nipple nine times and then subtract 3 so it's 6. 6 times a lady. Then you're done. This time it's for real. Let's party. Put on the hat, it's not over yet. Strap down. Get a drink. Don't shoot me. Shoot him! Ha ha, I laugh at your antics for you are a silly person, you do silly things that often I command you to do because if I didn't tell you silly things to do you would never do anything silly and that would be boring! It is advantageous to know every thing you're going to do before you do it. And it's amazing that you fall for it every time. You are a dumb whore. !!========================================================================!! !! (c) !LA HOE REVOLUCION PRESS! #391 - WRITTEN BY: TRILOBYTE - 12/28/98 !!