Note: The Truly Tasteless BBS has the pleasure of providing you with the following humor. Please direct any updates, comments, improvements, etc. to TTT BBS at (415)-364-4339, or by mail at 1583 Cordilleras Road, Redwood City, CA 94062. Thanks! Richard Lane Sysop Arno the German Shepherd's GET LAID FOR SURE maxims: 1. Sniff around! 2. Always settle for second best! 3. Get stuck together! WHY CAN'T HELEN KELLER HAVE BABIES? BECAUSE SHE'S DEAD DEATH IS A LETHAL GENE STERILITY IS HERIDETARY! Did you know that in the mid 1800's tigars roamed freely in singapore and the dahlia, oinsettia, begonia, and zinnia are flowers native to mexico and the dimension of europe is 3,750,000 square miles and 1 barrel of molasses equals 650 pounds and one ton of coal is equivalent to two cords of wood for steam purposes and to sharpen dull files lay them in diluted sulphuric acid until they are eaten deep enough??????? That there are about as many molecules in a teaspoon of water as there are teaspoons of water in the world? Do you care? ... A young boy runs into a general store and shouts, "Gimme a piss-pot!" The owner shouts back, "Hey, you can't just come in here and say that! Go home and get a note from your mother. And furthermore, what size???" The little boy slinks off, then comes back in 5 minutes to say, "My mother says that if it will fit your face, it will fit her ass, and she ain't going to write no fucking note!" Knock knock. who's there? honeydew. Honeydew who? Honeydew you love me? now we cantalope. What do toilet paper and the starship "Enterprise" have in common???? They both circle Uranus looking for klingons and they both go where no man has gone before. What did Mr. Spock find in the toilet ? the captain's log.